[Joinee Dave]

Hey all,

So, I need some help. Me and Rach (Burns) have applied to be on Only Connect, the BBC4 quiz show.

We did rather well in our application, and have been invited to audition in Birmingham on Sunday the 19th Feb. However, we only have two team members, and need a third. If you fancy it, let me know!

Dave

[Joinee Dave]

Hey folks!

Just a quick update. Me, Rach, and Sean had our Only Connect audition yesterday, and it went rather well. We will find out this week whether we will be carrying the Joinee flag into the realms of an obscure BBC4 quiz show.

[Chez]

I've got my fingers and toes crossed for you all. I LOVE Only Connect, and I know that Sean loves Victoria Coren more ;-)

[Joinee Dave]

Chez, on 20 February 2012 - 12:03 PM, said:

I've got my fingers and toes crossed for you all. I LOVE Only Connect, and I know that Sean loves Victoria Coren more ;-)

Thanks Chez.

I can probably say that Miss Coren is the entire reason for at least two of the team applying.

[Joinee Evilrhian]

I am proper jel, I have a *mahoosive* girl crush on Victoria. I am also in awe of anyone who can make it through any of the rounds of OC intact (apart from the last round. I can do the last round )

[Lethal Biddle]

Woo! Good luck team!

I don't really get the widespread geek-crush on Victoria Coren. But so much has David Mitchell cultivated my favour, agreeing as I do with almost everything he ever seems to say. That when it was rumoured they might be dating I immediately liked her a bit more, after all, how could David Mitchell be wrong?

While I wish you the best of luck, I will naturally be playing against you if you're on TV. As I do with every Only Connect team. And I will probably shout "HA!" if I manage to get an answer before you.

[PJ Hannah B-R]

I find her totally vile! She does my nut! However, the programme is ace.

[Joinee Dave]

I'll be honest, I was quite surprised to find out there *was* a widespread geek crush on her. I just didn't think she was that well known outside of poker.

I will be doing my best David Mitchell impression when/if I meet her. My intelligent yet understated ranting should do quite nicely. That's assuming I don't turn into a gibbering wreck and just mumble at my shoes as I usually do in famous company.

Oh, and cheers for all the good luck vibes. Needless to say, I will inform you all the second I find out whether we've made it, or have had our hopes of being on the show (my hopes of meeting VC) cruelly dashed upon the pointy rocks of life.

This post has been edited by Joinee Dave: 20 February 2012 - 02:06 PM

[Platinum Joinee Plub]

I'm torn between wanting you guys to get onto the show, and nervous that if Sean gets to stand in the same room as her, he'll start humping her leg like a little dog....

[Joinee Dave]

Platinum Joinee Plub, on 21 February 2012 - 12:01 AM, said:

I'm torn between wanting you guys to get onto the show, and nervous that if Sean gets to stand in the same room as her, he'll start humping her leg like a little dog....

My wife is much the same. She's looking at getting time off to come and keep an eye on me, to make sure I don't make too much of an arse of myself.

[HJCotW Spacemonkey]

There's no need to worry about leg humping. It's the fact that when she sees how intelligent, charming and erudite I am, she'll be on me like a fat girl on cake.

MoT
HJCotW

[Joinee Dave]

HJCotW Spacemonkey, on 21 February 2012 - 09:39 PM, said:

There's no need to worry about leg humping. It's the fact that when she sees how intelligent, charming and erudite I am, she'll be on me like a fat girl on cake.

MoT
HJCotW

They did like your face, very much. I think it was the simple joy at getting an answer right.

I am getting nervous now.

I also have a hunch that they will ask you or Rach to be captain, as you were both more vocal than me.

[Poohbah (Gsq)]

I have never seen this show. In fact, I'd have never even heard of it if it wasn't for you lot. And I tried to play it online to see what it was all about (coz I think Rach has links to it on FB or something sometimes) and I was massively bad at it. Which is nice.

Oh, and good luck!! Your brains clearly work in ways which mine don't.

[Platinum Joinee Plub]

HJCotW Spacemonkey, on 21 February 2012 - 09:39 PM, said:

There's no need to worry about leg humping. It's the fact that when she sees how intelligent, charming and erudite I am, she'll be on me like a fat girl on cake.

MoT
HJCotW

And I can't even get mad....

[Joinee Dave]

I am delighted to confirm that we will be representing all of Joineekind on the hardest bloody quiz show on the telly.

Good lord, what have we done?

[Rachel Parkin]

I still can't quite believe it! What on earth are we doing?! And no, Dave, you stay as captain!

[Joinee Dave]

Rachel Parkin, on 25 February 2012 - 08:11 PM, said:

I still can't quite believe it! What on earth are we doing?! And no, Dave, you stay as captain!

I've had a conversation with one of last years contestants on Twitter. A chap called Simon Belcher. Great name. He said that they felt pretty much the same as we do right now. Which I suppose makes me feel slightly less nervous.

[Joinee Meek]

This is so exciting! I love Only Connect. Congratulations guys!

[Worm]

Joinee Dave, on 27 February 2012 - 10:43 AM, said:

I've had a conversation with one of last years contestants on Twitter. A chap called Simon Belcher. Great name. He said that they felt pretty much the same as we do right now. Which I suppose makes me feel slightly less nervous.

Simon Belcher? Really. I wonder.....I went to school with a guy called Simon Belcher. Will investigate.

[HJCotW Spacemonkey]

Hello all,

Here is a small field report from the day of our heat. I shan't mention anything that may or may not have happened on the day of the quarter finals, as that would reveal whether we did or did not win our heat, which we're not allowed to do. Not only that, but it would spoil the viewing for everyone.

We met David Stainer, captain of the multi-time Champion of Champions in the hotel bar on Saturday night, as he was filming a special on Sunday. Until that point I was completely unaware that there was such a thing as the 'Quizzing World'. Apparently, it's a proper community.

Sunday was the day the clocks went forward, meaning that we got an hours less sleep than we would have hoped, which, to be fair, isn't what you'd hope for going into literally the hardest quiz on tv.

We were met by the producers, who couldn't have been happier to have us there. Unless they were just the nicest people in the world, I can't help but honestly believe that they loved us and wanted us to do well. In fact, I've felt that way since the audition, when we just had a laugh more than anything else. We were immediately offered tea, which endeared the whole staff to me.

After a quick wardrobe check, and a trip to make-up, it was onto the set for a rehearsal. The set is real, by the way, but the team names are CGI - as is the big wall. You also don't see the heiroglyphs, they have the names written down for you instead, meaning we weren't able to ask for 'The snake at DisneyLand.'

The rehearsal was chaired by Jenny, the producer, who we believe has a boyfriend who does extreme sports. This is based on nothing more than having met her, but Dave and I both decided the same thing independantly, so it must be right. The divine Ms Coren arrived on set just as I had buzzed in for one of the missing vowels questions - category 'Comedy catchphrases.' The first thing she said was a barked instruction that 'I want to hear it as an impression or not at all.' I then busted out a passable Kenny Everett She was incredibly impressed (which, believe it or not, isn't too hyperbolic - she even tweeted me as much earlier tonight).

After having photos taken, and following a whispered proclomation from Rachel that Victoria was on her gay list - obviously not remembering that she was mic'd up, and that comment would, therefore, have been heard by the entire production crew - it was time to start the show. And it really does bear watching when the series begins again in the Autumn...

Incidentally, Dave had to film about four different explanations of what Join Me actually was

Some time later, as we were celebrating/commiserating (delete as applicable after transmission), Dave told VC that we had something for her (fnar), and she promised to come see us once she'd finished with the production stuff. As we sat having some lunch, she bounded over to our table, exclaiming, 'Right, where's my present?' and was then taken somewhat aback when Dave actually produced from under the table a gift bag for her. I don't think she actually believed us, and looked genuinely delighted when given a bottle of wine and an engagement card. She then sat with us for a good five or ten minutes discussing wedding plans before being ushered away again. It never really occured to me at the time, but looking back, it is quite surreal that I sat next to Victoria Coren and essentially got her blessing for a September wedding Apparently, it's the best time of year for it. She also warned me that I shouldn't tell the drunk part in the story of how and why I got engaged.

Overall, the day was fantastic - an experience I'll not forget. It was especially brilliant to meet VC and find out that she's lovely - always a fear when you put someone on a bit of a pedestal. Everyone involved went out of their way to make the whole thing as easy and relaxed as possible, and we were looked after every step of the way. As to whether or not we made it through to another round, well, you'll just have to wait and see...

MoT
HJCotW

[Joinee Dave]

Nicely put Sean.

Join Me is difficult to sum up when you've got a couple of lines to do it. I hope I haven't made us sound too ridiculous. Plus, the fact that VC was staring into my eyes made it ever so tricky to concentrate.

She was absolutely lovely though, which I am extremely pleased about.

[Rachel Parkin]

I left my wedding ring in the hotel room and had to dash back for it from the taxi.
I went into the gents' toilets by mistake.
And oh god, the gay list thing.

With a handicap like me on the team, I'm surprised we even made it past the auditions.
The chaps have said it all really, it was an incredible experience, Ms Coren was lovely and so were the rest of the crew.
VC and I shared a 'hashtag pedantry' moment when we both noticed a rogue apostrophe on the autocue.
Oh and Dave was '3 pints off pissing in an airblade.'

[Poohbah (Gsq)]

Glad you guys had a blast! Give us a shout when it's on the tellybox and I'll watch your glory/misery

[Rachel Parkin]

Lou - of course we'll let you know. Whatever the outcome, it was a brilliant show!