A little help!

#1 sparrows lass

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Posted 10 January 2012 - 11:21 AM

Greetings everyone, I am a newbee. I am a 38 year old single woman who currently needs your help. Please let me explain. I am normaly a kind hearted, thoughtful, caring person who loves making people happy. However the following problems have hit me hard and they are stopping me being the once kind person that I was.

I currently live on my own in a flat in a small town in the Midlands area. The town where I live offers no social activities which means within the 2 years of me living here I have not made friends with anyone, nor do I have any friends at all.

I work part time on minimum wage in the retail trade which means I am claiming housing benefit to help pay rent. (I am not proud of this fact!) This means that I cannot afford to give money to any charitys.

The building which I live in is filled with people who wishes not to interact with any other neighbour.

On May 12th 2011 at a film premiere I had lost my faith in humanity.

Currently I am facing majour problems at work. I wont go into detail on what's going on but I will say this... I feel like its the people at work versus me. And because I am sensitive and have zero friends to talk to or help me out I am now suffering from depression.

So this is where I need your help. I want to bring back the kind hearted, thoughtful person I used to be. If anyone can give me suggestions on how I can make a complete stranger happy without them looking at me like i'm from another planet I would be most grateful.

Thank you for reading.

... Additional Please do not help with the depression part I am tackling this problem myself.

#2 Joinee Meek

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Posted 10 January 2012 - 03:10 PM

Hiya and welcome to the forum! One of my old RAoKs I used to do a lot was to leave a book or magazine I'd finished with on a bus or train with a little note saying that I hoped the person who found the book enjoyed it. Or go to your local library and write a cheerful note and put it in the library book. Maybe a quote you like or that inspires you?

Hope these suggestions are useful and it is lovely to have you here!

#3 PJ Hannah B-R

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Posted 10 January 2012 - 04:01 PM

I keep an eye out for anyone who looks like they're a bit lost (people looking confused at a map is normally a good start) and bound over and ask if I can help them. TERRIFYING the first time, but really satisfying when you can help.

Also, I smile and say hello to anyone whose eye I catch.

Welcome in and hope being nice makes you feel nice again xxx

The greatest danger for most of us is not that our aim is to high and we miss it, but that it is too low and we reach it.

Never look down on someone unless you're helping them up.

#4 sparrows lass

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Posted 10 January 2012 - 04:13 PM

Thank you for your kind replys. I'm not sure if I know of any inspirational quotes but if I come across any I will certainly pop it into a library book. However I do love books and would never give any of my books away. I never see anyone looking at a map in the small town where I live and sadly anyone who does walk past me seems to walk past or try to walk through me like im a ghost... Needless to say I need to do more to make people smile.

#5 Poohbah (Gsq)

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Posted 10 January 2012 - 09:27 PM

On the book theme, how about sneaking a book token into a book in a shop? You can get them for £1 or £2 (I assume you still can? I've not done this one for a couple of years) so it doesn't have to be expensive.

How about making an extra effort to hold doors open for people? Just to hold them open maybe a little longer than you normally would, maybe hold it open for a whole string of people rather than letting the next person hold the door for the person behind them etc, all done with a big smile! If I saw someone holding a door open for lots of people just to be nice, it'd make me smile. I'm quite simple like that.

And, hello! Welcome to the forum

Oh, the other thing I meant to say is - is there anywhere nearby where you can volunteer? So just giving up a couple of hours of your week would really make a difference to someone?

I am the Grand Pooh-Bah of the Universe.
"I daaaaannnncciiin' like a monkey!!!"
"What can I say? I come from race cars and pop-rock..."

#6 sparrows lass

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Posted 10 January 2012 - 09:44 PM

Unfortunately the only places where I can do volunteer work is in a shop. Being as I currently work in one and having majour problems, I don't see me volunteering in a shop. As for the book token thing, I'm loving that idea. Thank you

#7 Gold Joinee Abad

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Posted 11 January 2012 - 11:21 AM

I hope you can find some inspiration here:

welcome!

FREE HUGS!!

#8 Joinee Mum White

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Posted 11 January 2012 - 12:30 PM

Hello, and welcome, m'dear. It can be really hard to do things when you are on your own and feel that people are ignoring you. One of my favourite cheap and easy RAOKs is to buy a chocolate bar, or similar when I am getting my shopping at the supermarket, and then giving it to the person on the checkout. I just say Thank you for serving me, this is for you for your tea break, leave it on the conveyor and make a dash for it

Oh - I live in a small town in the Midlands, too. Mum White x

There are no strangers here, only friends we haven't met yet.

#9 Poohbah (Gsq)

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Posted 12 January 2012 - 12:11 AM

Oo once I bought 5 yoyos in a toy shop (they were pretty much the cheapest thing I could find) and then asked the guy working there to give one out to the next 5 children who came into the shop. I briefly explained Join Me (in the random acts of kindness sense, I didn't go right back to Gallus..!) so that he knew where I was coming from with it.

(I then actually hung out in the stationery shop across the road so I could see him handing them out, and the kids were SO excited to get a free toy! I'm not sure that I totally recommend hiding and watching a toy store though....!! :unsure:

)

Oh AND! That same day I bought a bag of Werther's Originals and handed them out to all the old men sat outside Marks and Spencers waiting for their wives who were in the shop! They were very grateful. And later we bumped into one on the old men again, once he'd got his wife back from the shop, and she was so pleased that we had some sweets left and she could have one because she'd been really jealous when he'd told her about it! :lol:

You might get a few funny looks doing this one, but if you're brave and just smile nicely it should be OK!

I am the Grand Pooh-Bah of the Universe.
"I daaaaannnncciiin' like a monkey!!!"
"What can I say? I come from race cars and pop-rock..."

#10 sparrows lass

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Posted 12 January 2012 - 11:21 AM

These are some great ideas, when I get paid at the end of the month I'll certainly use these suggestions. Thank you all.

#11 GJ Drought

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Posted 12 January 2012 - 06:31 PM

sounds like things right now are rough! sorry to hear this. If you havent read YES MAN yet you should, quite inspirational to people ( like myself) who can feel stuck in a rut!

making people happy... leave a note under someones windscreen wipers advising them how nice they look today! silly, but good for a cheap grin!

Buzz the Builder
Buzz Aldrin
Cap'n joinee Drought

long is the elephant that fits in a drain pipe!