[Gold Joinee Rothwell]

Y'know what? I sometimes wonder why we bother with this place?
We make a huge effort to come down to a meet that is at the complete other end of the country. We make financial sacrifices that we really can't afford. We take time off work where we could have worked and taken at another time more fitting. We endure the very long journey from Newcastle to Brighton.

But some people can't even be bothered to travel from London to Brighton... Not even for the day, it seems. Forget about having to splash out on somewhere to stay.... some people can't be bothered to spend what was the £4 each way to get from london to Brighton.

And to think... I, myself was really excited about seeing some people and having chance to catch up on the beach or in a pub. (not to mention hannah)
I guess they're not that excited about seeing me.... or us.

Ah well... I guess the "London way" has finally rubbed off on some people.

[Siobhán]

I have a really good reason for not going, and in fact nearly decided to go so I could see you guys as I know what a huge effort you have made to come. I know it is sad that soem people are not coming but some people do want to see you and can't.

[Gold Bismuth Shortt]

What's the "London Way"?
Lots of things change over time so yes tis a shame that some people can no longer make it but doesn't mean they can't be bothered to make the trip.

And those that are coming (me being one) we are excited about it, in fact I'm taking this trip as my own little holiday since is all I can afford.

We will miss those not there but it's not the only chance we have to see them, there are plenty of meets and trips to be made - tis a long summer ahead of us

That's all really I very much agree with Siobhan

This post has been edited by Joinee Shortt: 30 June 2008 - 02:28 PM

[Gold Joinee Rothwell]

Hi shorty

I think what i meant was that there are a fair few people that really just dont want to make the effort. I mean... God forbid any London joinee come up to... newcastle.
(exception given to wilf and kneller)

[Siobhán]

Anna

I think there is a tendency for people in London to think people should visit them as they live in London. This is sad and can make people outside London feel they are making all the effort. I am not goign to brighton for my own resons whihc Jamie and Hannah are aware of and understand, but it is sad they are travelling so far, and have made such a big sacrifice to be seemingly snubbed by thier friends (though I am sure this is not the case). Friendships are a two way street and require effort on the part of both parties. I know I have been remiss in vistiting friends in Slough, Guildofrd and Eastbourne and other outside of London places and that cna make them feel liek they are putting in all the effort.

[Timothy Goose]

Gold Joinee Rothwell, on 30 Jun 2008, 01:30 PM, said:

Hi shorty

I think what i meant was that there are a fair few people that really just dont want to make the effort. I mean... God forbid any London joinee come up to... newcastle.
(exception given to wilf and kneller)

I know I'm not a London joinee yet.. But I hope I fall into this exception too...

Biddle & I are gutted not to be going to Pirates main day 1 but we have to take William Dean to the Chap Olympics. We promised a year ago at the wedding that we would do it.

And then we're coming stright down.

and by then you'll have settled nicely in my house stolen the best beds and towels and drunk all my tea


Looking forward to seeing you
I will be wearing the Green Suit to the olympics - So you can see me in all my swiss goodness

[Joinee Mum White]

C'mon, Mr Grumpy! I'm coming, so there will be rum and hugs ... what more could you want? Mum White xxx

[PJ Hannah B-R]

Tim - will you not sweat to death wearing that in midsummer?

And Siobhan - you summed it up absolutely perfectly. I've given up inviting people to Newcastle. I had 6 what I considered close friends when I lived in London. And I feel like I've lost them. It makes me very sad.

[Gold Bismuth Shortt]

Ah well, it is a shame that some don't make the effort yes but think there's more too it.

I just wanted to write how I felt too that's all. I look forward to seeing different people then!

This post has been edited by Joinee Shortt: 30 June 2008 - 02:45 PM

[Timothy Goose]

GJ Hannah B-R, on 30 Jun 2008, 01:36 PM, said:

Tim - will you not sweat to death wearing that in midsummer?

I do that anyway

I'm hoping that as its a chappist spot we shall be in the shade... And if it is too hot I can always take my jacket off

But I wanted you to see it in use

[Golden Judas]

I really wish I could be there-you know how much I love Brighton and seeing you guys but i'm afraid that with the constraints being put on my wallet this month it just doesn't look feasible. I've just moved(deposits etc),got to buy flights,hotels and stuff for my wee cuz's wedding the week after Brighton and my Mum's in London fae the states for a few days so I've got to show her round.

I've even had to cancel Holiday's I booked in January for Brighton.

I came to Newcastle too-but you guys weren't around. I love to go to other places.

I'm really sorry that you feel that we 'London' types aren't making an effort but some of us have other stuff going on that is unavoidable.

I may just have had an idea.

[Gold Joinee Rothwell]

I would like to point out that this wasn't directed at all londoners.
and thus ends my rant.
thanks people

[Joinee Meek]

Thank God it's not just me.

I do really appreciate that people have visited me and those people know that- but it sometimes alarms me how much money I have spent on going to see people and to meets when I only had a Saturday job/from my student loan.

Actually what annoys me most is the fact that people still have a ridiculously narrow minded view of Newcastle and the North.

[PJ Stevie G]

edit: didn;t want to say it anymore

This post has been edited by Stalker Joinee Stevie G: 30 June 2008 - 05:21 PM

[Platinum Joinee Wilf (GD)]

I have been to Newcastle twice in recent months and have not met any Joinees. This is absolutely fine and dandy - people just were not available.

I am not available for Brighton.

*shrugs*


PS: Despite it breaking me the last time I was there, I rather liked Newcastle. I would have liked it more if I had gone to Buffalo Joe's and seen scantily clad girls. But I went to Casualty instead.

This post has been edited by Platinum Joinee Wilf (GA): 30 June 2008 - 05:38 PM

[Thorners (a.k.a. Claire)]

Platinum Joinee Wilf (GA), on 30 Jun 2008, 06:37 PM, said:

PS: Despite it breaking me the last time I was there, I rather liked Newcastle. I would have liked it more if I had gone to Buffalo Joe's and seen scantily clad girls. But I went to Casualty instead.

You are so glam, Wilf! How is the foot of doom, by the way?

[Mr Phil]

Jamie.

Been stupidly busy and ill all this year.

Team Summer begins in Brighton. Inverness. Edinburgh. Newcastle. Exmouth. London. Possibly also Birmingham.

See you soon matey.

[PJ Hannah B-R]

In order to speak for myself a tiny bit...what has upset me is that I am coming all the way down there specifically to see certain people. These are certain people who I spoke to on several occasions about me coming down there. To see them. I hoped they would make every effort to come too so that they could see me. They haven't. They have other things going on, fine. But it still has upset me quite a lot because I've made all this effort and I'm not feeling it back. And I guess it's realising that people I thought I was really close to I'm just not any more.

It hurts and Jamie got very defensive for me about it. So there we are.

[DG Joinee NEMESIS]

I may be "out"

I can't say why

as is the way of things.....


i'll know on friday

[Platinum Joinee West]

and this is why I am so eternally glad there is a GGF... and it's not even as far as Newcastle!!

[Joinee Varwell]

Jamie, Hannah, I know what you mean. In the old days when I used to travel to London a lot for work, I cocked a lot, I got to know a lot of the Londoners, went to the Ks, and really enjoyed it all. And when lots of Londonists came up to the first Joinverness, I did a little mini-yay! inside.

However... less and less folk seem willing to travel, and even GGF often struggles to get folk. Maybe that's the changing nature of things, maybe people just move on. I dunno.

I often reckon folk are less willing to get out of where they are, the bigger that place is. The number of Weegies I met while living in Glasgow who thought that anything north of Stirling was bandit country, was depressing.

More folk seem to have pulled out of Joinverness this year than signed up in the first place, and sometimes when you live far from the madding crowds in a place that folk are unwilling to go to, you just have to sit back, not let it get to you, and remind yourself how wonderful it is to be outward looking and to live somewhere special that only the best people make it to.

[Mr Phil]

*knows he's one of the best people*

[G.J.Knight]

I saw Jamie in March and saw Hannah last December , I like to think they have seen enough of me for at least a year this is my saturation point

In fairness though some friends live literally 15 mins away and I have not seen them in about 2 months

[Joinee Rufous]

G.J.Knight, on 30 Jun 2008, 11:14 PM, said:

In fairness though some friends live literally 15 mins away and I have not seen them in about 2 months

That's cos apparently it's cheaper for us money-no-object, no-better-than-we-ought-to-be London folk to get to Brighton than to Wimbledon.

And I never liked you in the first place.

[G.J.Knight]

Joinee Rufous, on 30 Jun 2008, 11:23 PM, said:

That's cos apparently it's cheaper for us money-no-object, no-better-than-we-ought-to-be London folk to get to Brighton than to Wimbledon.

And I never liked you in the first place.

Who are you?

[Joinee Rufous]

G.J.Knight, on 30 Jun 2008, 11:25 PM, said:

Who are you?

The disguise works!

Give me 6 months to grow the hair back...



Miss you, hun!

[Joinee Goldy]

Wow, I love the smell of guilt trips in the morning

Lets face it the only meet everyone seems to make an effort to get to is the Karmageddon, the others have been popular by popular demand and based on the news of last years it may not be as appealing as say the previous ones to that have been, if people have a reason not to come that reason needs to be taken at face value because chances are it's not going to change.

I myself have all the weekends in July booked up bar the first one with things ranging from another fancy dress party to seeing numerous joinees in various places and looking after Megs as well, I litterally can't afford everything I want to do so something took a hit and that something was Pirates this year, for that I'm sorry, I've never been a "beach" person anyway so it was the easier choice to make.

As for the "London Thing" I may work in London but that certainly wouldn't stop me going to somewhere I wanted to be so stop that tosh already

Though I'm also guessing I'm not one of the people Hannah wants to see, though I will miss seeing what shape senior Rothwell's beard thing is in this summer, I shal no doubt catch you at Karmageddon like many others will though

[Gold Joinee Rothwell]

Joinee Goldy, on 1 Jul 2008, 11:19 AM, said:

though I will miss seeing what shape senior Rothwell's beard thing is in this summer,

Goldy.... i have some bad news...

although you have just given me a superb idea about growing my handlebar tash for the weekend.... gah but that means that i will have to have a semi handlebar tash for Ashley Hames' book launch up here and I dont fancy going to a load of strip clubs with him looking like that... hmm... maybe I do.

[Joinee Varwell]

Joinee Goldy, on 1 Jul 2008, 11:19 AM, said:

Lets face it the only meet everyone seems to make an effort to get to is the Karmageddon

That may be true for many folk, my good namesake, but not for some. For me, the "one" would be GGF.

[PJ Hannah B-R]

Gold Joinee Rothwell, on 1 Jul 2008, 12:58 PM, said:

Goldy.... i have some bad news...

although you have just given me a superb idea about growing my handlebar tash for the weekend.... gah but that means that i will have to have a semi handlebar tash for Ashley Hames' book launch up here and I dont fancy going to a load of strip clubs with him looking like that... hmm... maybe I do.

I am proud of this post.

Jamie put the apostrophe in the correct place on Hames.

I love him lots for this.

I'm a loser.


GROW YOUR HANDLEBAR BACK!!!!

[Gold Joinee Spaca-Sweeney(GA)]

I regard myself as part of the london collective and i have been to join meets all over the world,... so meh

We are going to be out of the country when brighton is on, it just so happens that the whole trip to germany is cheaper than a hotel in brighton!
Also, i didnt have a good time last year, it was far too much about getting drunk and throwing bottles then anything else so im giving it a miss this year. I have been going to brighton meets since brighton 1, which i helped organise with Lady Laura, and i think it is a shame that it has turned from a family friendly ROAK style meet, into a beach bender...

Might come next year, depends on how this year goes.

Andy

[Joinee Smith]

I've been to GGF and Loverpool this year. And had a Join Meet in LA. Missed Brighton last year and don't like the sounds of it from the reports I've heard so far (including the bottle throwing which I've just read about.) This year's one is abandoning the beach from what I've heard in favour of a pub in the evening due to what sounds like a facebook organised rave taking control of a large part of the beach. Not my cup of tea and not the kind of Brighton meet that I used to love going to back in the early days. Hope it works out okay and you have fun!



Jason

[Hebba Homemaker]

Thing is the same thing is true when you go to other places outwith meet time, I've found a lot in recent months if I go somewhere to see people, the only ones I actually see are whomever I am staying with. Now fair enough other people have their own lifes and other things going on and I understand that I really do, but... especially when going to London I hate trying to see people because even within London Boroughs no one ever seems willing to travel (unless of course you happen to be down on a Thursday for Cock (which I never am... damn my having a 9-5 job!)) This is in no way a dig or jibe at anyone more a statement of my disappointment that when I tell people in advance I am going to be in the area and would like to see them and offer to change all my plans to try and suit them, they still can't even seem to make the slightest effort in even bothering to tell me they are not available. *sweeping generalisation brought on by feeling unpopular*

I'm in the same boat I live nowhere near anyone (with the exception of Mhairi) and sometimes it does feel like I am the only one making the effort to visit given the sheer amount of times I have travelled south (and east and north for that matter) and yet only 4 people have ever come to see me (I am not including weegies or former weegies) any time anyone comes to Glasgow (or even Edinburgh for that matter) I always make the effort to go spend time with them, maybe I'm just starved for company I don't know but I can sympathise with HBR and others that feel they make the effort when noone else does. (speaking of which Hannah, I am trying to get Mhairi or Lucie to come see you! unfortunately the only time I could take Mhairi would be Brighton weekend! Typical!)

WoW there are a whole load of brackets in there, sorry about that

[Joinee Goldy]

Gold Joinee Rothwell, on 1 Jul 2008, 12:58 PM, said:

Goldy.... i have some bad news...

You, wound me, with, words.... /cry

commatastic

p.s. grow it back for Karmageddon you big hairy man loving tart you

[GJ Claire]

Hannah I'm not coming to Brighton. I'll be at work, a place I absolutely hate on a Saturday because I had no idea the Brighton meet was taking place because I've been eating and sleeping work and my degree for the past 6 months. The last time I went out with Matt must have been 3 or 4 months ago and we live together. The last time I saw Anun and Ruf was Easter and they are only in Nottinghill. When I haven't ben working I've been sleeping. BELIEVE ME I'd rather be in Brighton or Newcastle but I'm getting one weekend off a month at the moment ... hence I handed my notice in.

Things change. I like to think friendships don't, I like to think it's understood when sometimes life takes over because you get your priorities wrong. Don't take it so personally, it's not about not making an effort. I have to give a months notice for a day off and now it's just too late.

[Shiney Joinee Jackson]

Look at it like this.....you get to see new people rather than all the old grumpy sods you see all the time.

[Joinee Ems]

I'm in a position where are can't even take holiday on particular days, with notice or no. I love my job most of the time and like Claire says, it's not about not making the effort. This post really upsets me. As does the fact that I also feel like I don't get to see people any more. And I'm IN London. Life goes on, people have to get on with their own thing and things change. Sorry.

[PJ Hannah B-R]

You know what.

I don't want to defend myself. But I think I'm completely justified in feeling upset by it so I'm going to continue doing so. I made an effort to see people, to be somewhere where people could come together and I'm upset that it hasn't happened. I know people have other lives, I'm not saying the whole world should stop and revolve around me, but I AM upset that an attempt to get my friends together WHO I MISS, has failed.

I'm not going to apologise for being upset about that.

[Gold Joinee Rothwell]

^ What she said

[Joinee Ems]

I am also upset that similar attempts I have made have failed. I have not however gone on a guilt trip.

I came on here because I'm looking into the possibility of making it this weekend. Now I feel less inclined.

[Captain K]

You know, visiting friends can be expensive.

Last time I went to see Jamie (after Crispy Ducks), I got fined £25 for being squint. Dangerous place, South Shields.

[GJ Claire]

That's cool. Be upset that we arn't there but I'm gutted about the London rubbing off on you comment. And the fact that you think there's no effort being made. Because it's just not like that. If I'dve known about it then Id've gone. But I didnt because I haven't been around much due to being ridiculously tired and as I said, degree focused.

And I'll say it again, I quit my job because I haven't seen my friends this year. Every time something happens I'm either at work, tired from working all day or I'm at college. Effort made I think.

Enjoy Brighton, glass is half full and all that.

[DG Joinee NEMESIS]

Captain K, on 9 Jul 2008, 03:22 PM, said:

You know, visiting friends can be expensive.

Last time I went to see Jamie (after Crispy Ducks), I got fined £25 for being squint. Dangerous place, South Shields.

yeah - if you will park like my Mother though......

[Captain K]

Silver Joinee'The Daddy', on 9 Jul 2008, 06:29 PM, said:

yeah - if you will park like my Mother though......

Man, that's low.

I have one thing to say to you: http://www.rijbewijs.nl/nl/english.asp

[GJ Michelle P]

Captain K, on 9 Jul 2008, 09:22 AM, said:

You know, visiting friends can be expensive.

Ain't that the truth!

[Joinee Meek]

Maybe it's cos Newcastle is quite cut off from other Northern places as well as the South but I see where Hannah is coming from. I for one still now especially feel very out the loop with many people I would have considered friends and now just don't bother because I was tired of it getting to me.

I'm not saying it's a London thing but I know how hard it is to miss people-wherever they are.

I also know I could have gone to Brighton but that was my choice not to for my own reasons.

Edit: Just cos I missed a bit out.

This post has been edited by Joinee Meek: 09 July 2008 - 05:52 PM

[Gold Joinee Rothwell]

PJ Emily, on 9 Jul 2008, 03:19 PM, said:

I am also upset that similar attempts I have made have failed. I have not however gone on a guilt trip.

I came on here because I'm looking into the possibility of making it this weekend. Now I feel less inclined.

Now who is throwing a guilt trip?

GJ Claire, on 9 Jul 2008, 05:56 PM, said:

That's cool. Be upset that we arn't there but I'm gutted about the London rubbing off on you comment. And the fact that you think there's no effort being made. Because it's just not like that. If I'dve known about it then Id've gone. But I didnt because I haven't been around much due to being ridiculously tired and as I said, degree focused.

And I'll say it again, I quit my job because I haven't seen my friends this year. Every time something happens I'm either at work, tired from working all day or I'm at college. Effort made I think.

Enjoy Brighton, glass is half full and all that.

Claire, the london comment is valid as it has been pointed out by several other people as well.
The point i was trying to make here is that we have planned this for well over a month because, yes, we also work and have other commitments. Hannah tried to plan something so she could see all of her friends. Thankfully that is now possible for some of them. but its comments like what Emily said that really does show what I meant with the title of this thread.
Claire, I know you're busy with degree and work and having to put up with matt. I dread to think how little sleep you must get with him being as gangly as he is. Your bed must be like sleeping with an open bag of twiglets poured on it . But we started to plan this in april in the hope that we would get to see some people we really wanted to see and hoped that they would, at least,make that extra effort, as we have, to see us. This is probably where the London comment comes in. We travel from the top of england. Whereas some people cant even jump on a tube for half an hour. Do you see my point?
If you've not been on here to see all the planning that has been going on then fine.

What I am glad about with this thread is that people HAVE bothered to reply... even if it was with excuses.

(Oh... and I do hope that you haven't read all that as if I was in a bad mood or having a go at anyone...because i wasn't... my face was mainly vacant for most of it)

This post has been edited by Gold Joinee Rothwell: 09 July 2008 - 06:00 PM

[DG Joinee NEMESIS]

I think the point i was trying, ineptly to make with Sean the other day, is that i consider there's two different view points....and is valid here.

I plan to see my friends. Just them - at a weekend (some joinees, some not) or at a time far far in the future.....

I don't "expect" to see anyone at a meet.

It is what it is - a Joinee thing - and therefore it's up to individuals if they want to go to a meet.... Whilst i have friends that are joinees and joinees that have become friends....i like to discern a difference.

At meets i very rarely get to spend any time with those friends. Sean and I suffer terminally from this. We've known each other for a decade, but if i want to see "him" then i have to do it not at a meet - and i choose to make that effort, as does he, within the realms of the friendship. His costs/my random life/my random location at short notice - invariably make this difficult or impossible - more so than most. But the fact he still seeks me out regardless - is a testimony to his and our friendship....

To imply people are lesser friends or disappointment at not seeing friends, just because they aren't going to coincide with my attendance at a Join-meet, doesn't sit with me....for exactly the reason above.

I really hope you guys have a blinder when you head down, I really do. Would love to see a meet in Newcastle (given I've not seen you both since we all came up to South Shields/Crispy Ducks)....

But maybe, if it's friends you hope to see, then it should be just friends, not a meet like Brighton...

Hence I think this
I bother to go to meets for the meet
I bother to see my friends because they are friends.....

For me personally – they’re two very different (although slightly overlapping) things.

Have a giggle guys
If I make it – minus work commitments – I’ll see you there for the fun too.

Rich

[PJ Hannah B-R]

Just to hit that one point Rich - I can barely afford to go to a meet. I go to the meet because I figure I hit more birds with one stone that way. I certainly can't afford to go to see individual friends. I just don't have any money. That's why I come south for meets only.

[DG Joinee NEMESIS]

GJ Hannah B-R, on 9 Jul 2008, 07:32 PM, said:

Just to hit that one point Rich - I can barely afford to go to a meet. I go to the meet because I figure I hit more birds with one stone that way. I certainly can't afford to go to see individual friends. I just don't have any money. That's why I come south for meets only.

It's a fair comment - i won't deny it.....
And a choice you make....we all make i suppose to an extent.....