[Thomas]

I thought it'd be nice if we have a live buildup thread which can then be used for match commentary, and when the North score etc. so that non-GGF/BBSing Joinees and the rest of the world can keep up with events surrounding the match. Much like this sort of thing, except for some reason I can't find one with fan comments as well.

09:42 21/03

Well, we're just over 24 hours from kickoff folks! The players are on their way from all across the country for the sporting spectacle of the year. Team North Captain Thomas Rushton is just relaxing with coffee, a cigar and some Pink Floyd before heading to the main event. Team south captain Gatesy is thought to be still trying to find enough players willing to face The Mighty North.

WHO NEEDS THE FA CUP?!

[Gold Joinee Cooke]

10:17 21/03

"I'm predicting a comfortable victory for the northern boys. Here at Yurihonjo Junior High School we've been talking about little else all week, and Mr Cooke's been challenging us to gravy drinking contests to commemorate the event. At the end of the day the game's going to be won and lost on stupid mistakes, and after analysing last years footage we have determined that warren is shite, and therefore the north will emerge triumphant"

Random Japanese schoolboy, Akita, Japan

This post has been edited by Gold Joinee Cooke: 21 March 2008 - 10:32 AM

[Gold Double Pink Joinee Stooz]

10.32 21/3

Meanwhile, Team South star striker Stooz is struggling to be fully match fit after a first kickboxing lesson in the week. The legs are fine, but the arms are about as mobile as Stephen Hawkings with a puncture. One plus point for the lad - he definitely won't be in goal.

Norwich certainly has the bunting out for Team South. They'l lall be crowding round their TV's watching some no mark Premiership game, wishing they were there...

[GJ Dandy David]

Err... Thomas - What happened to not posting your real name? Won't you be "found"?


Go Team South!!!

[Thomas]

Joinee David, on 21 Mar 2008, 12:00 PM, said:

Err... Thomas - What happened to not posting your real name? Won't you be "found"?


Go Team South!!!

#!$& off and die you skinny little #!$&

[Thomas]

10:06 22/03

Kickoff looms and the players are beginning to make their way to the stadium of dreams. It's cold, windy and there are flurries of snow in the air.

Rothwell, Hatchard and VArwell are expected to be the first arrivals, shortly followed by Spaca, Manager Bennett, Rushton and Chairman Ranner. Not long now...

[Gold Joinee Cooke]

11:50am 22/3

6000 miles away the excitement is just as immense as it is at Stadio Del Join Me. As the Join Me Japan correspondent I can only describe the atmosphere in the land of the rising sun as PENSIVE. There are crowds of people outside my apartment ready to hear the updates shouted as the goals go in. Hatakeyama San is wearing his fake team north replica shirt with RUSHTON 69 on the back. He thinks it's so funny.

Well that's the news from Japan, now it's over to nottingham for the pre match build up.

This post has been edited by Gold Joinee Cooke: 22 March 2008 - 12:30 PM

[PJ Hannah B-R]

You're an hour out Phil! The match SHOULD have started by now. WHY NO UPDATES???

[Gold Joinee Cooke]

edited!

I know it's exciting but WE NEED NEWS!!!

COME ON PEOPLE!!!

GJC
CTID

[Captain K]

The ball exploded! They've all been smeared in horrible faux-leather goo! The match is off and the players are in the pub trying to convince the cheerleaders that having a dynamic - if equally gooey - young man rub beer into their flesh will be the best way to get the stuff off them!

[PJ Hannah B-R]

WHAT? That's pathetic!! What a #!$&ing let down!

[Captain K]

No, wait, it's okay! They've decided to hang the trophy on the results of a pub table-football match!

[Neil Diamond]

Three one to the north with five minutes to go

Make that four!

[Gold Joinee Cooke]

GET IN!!!!!!!!!

AND ABOUT #!$&ING TIME FOR THE UPDATES!!!!!

GJC
CTID

[Neil Diamond]

Final score four one!

[Poohbah (Gsq)]

Woooooooooooooo!!!

I Team North!

How many players did Team South have in the end??

This post has been edited by JoineeMassara GPB: 22 March 2008 - 02:45 PM

[Baron Curfew (GJ)]

It was the mascot bear that did it!!

[PJ Hannah B-R]

I'm so glad Kieran's information was reliable enough for me to start an argument with my boyfriend about how he didn't phone me when they got to the pub...


NICE ONE NORTH!

[Joinee Parkin]

YEEEEEEEESSSSSSSS!!!!!!

Well done boys!

[Worm]

A sterling effort from Team North, playing against the wind for a horrible first half, we managed to concede only one goal, which was, to be fair, a good strike from Stooz.

However, Team South then broke the ball, so we had to wait while someone was dispatched to find another one. An early half-time was called, while a ball was borrowed from the lads playing next to us, and we kicked off again.

Then, a nasty injury to a Team South Player, and the by now traditional North vs. South paramedics has to deal with it.

Finally, after 20 minutes, Team North got their eye in, and started peppering Wilf with shots.

I can't remember who scored the first goal, possibly Phil Hatchard, although there was a certain amount of dissent about whether the ball was too high.

However, there was no doubt about Spaca's second score, Phil putting away number 3 beautifully, or Matt Bee putting the final nail in the coffin.

In goal for Team North, I actually didn't have that much to do, other than try not to hurt Stooz too much as I tackled him - but all in all it was well played by everyone in terrible conditions.

This post has been edited by 1. Worm: 22 March 2008 - 04:21 PM

[Captain K]

Hannah: sorry - I'm not there!

But: what, the ball really did burst? Spooky!

[PJ Wopunga (GA)]

And what Team South Player got hurt? Hope they're recovering

[Mr Phil]

Richard Atkinson. He's on crutches.

Hee hee, I came on with 25 minutes to go just after said injury and scored the equaliser. It fell for me on the edge of the box and I hit a high shot over Wilf before it dropped just under the bar (probably).

Then from a throw-in from the right about five minutes later, I threw the ball to Stevie G, he chipped the ball across the face of goal, and Sean sidefooted the winner from 5 yards.

With just seven minutes on the clock, Varwell hit a low hard pass from the right wing to the edge of the area, a flick and a turn later I was past Scotty and composed myself before placing it into the bottom right hand corner.

Nearly stoppage time, and Matty Bee ran unchallenged from the half way line, beat two Team South defenders on the edge of the area and fired hard and low past Wilf.

No less than Team North deserved after only narrowly losing the first half playing into near-gale-force winds, then dominating the second.

That was fun. I didn't have much puff in me but really enjoyed it.


Edit: Missed a word out.

This post has been edited by Mr Hatchard: 22 March 2008 - 09:52 PM

[Mr Phil]

Oh, and Tigger was (wo)Man of the Match.

I forgot to say that.

[Joinee Mum White]

Not only did the ball burst in the match, it actually exploded very loudly, in the pub afterwards, while being photographed for posterity! Much fun and frostbite was had by all. Mum White xx

[Joinee Meek]

Wahey!

[PJ Stevie G]

A stupendous team victory.

I'm so glad I became northern

[SJ Del (The Train Man)]

MATCH REPORT

For those involved, it's not too much of an exaggeration to say that NvS '08 was the most important game of the season. Both sides were desperate to win, South determined to keep hold of The Shards trophy, North equally determined to wrest it back. After all the tension and hype, it was time to play football!

Th day of the match dawned overcast and cold. The air was dry but the ground was damp after overnight sleet. This, however, was not to last and there were soon more sleet flurries and a howling icy wind.

Team South were hit by a number of withdrawals, including captain Gatesy, and were forced to recruit a number of debutants such as Tigger McGregor and Sarah Kebab (Donna's sister). There was also the mysterious non-appearance of Scotty and so South were forced to start with nine players.
North sportingly also started with nine to even things out, but this of course meant they had subs to use!

The first ten to fifteen minutes were pretty even, as both teams struggled to cope with the fluctuating weather conditions. One moment there'd be not a breath of wind then there was an Arctic gale!
Scotty arrived with some story of actually being awake at 9am. We're still to get to the bottom of that story...and to even things up, Jamie came on for North.
The conditions were brought into perspective with a Team South corner. Floated into the box, the ball hung in the air for a good few seconds, with a sea of upturned faces waiting for it to drop!

As Worm has said, South took the lead when centre-forward Stooz hit a shot from well outside the area that flew into the net (if we'd had nets). Despite protestations from the crowd that it had gone wide, the goal stood. 1-0 South.

North pushed forwards in search for an equaliser but had to contend with the wind as well as the form of Wilf in the South goal.

South continued to press and finished the half with another good shot from Stooz, which went wide and unfortunately split the ball...

Players and supporters decamped to the cafe to attempt to defrost during what is probably the longest half-time break in history.

A ball was eventually 'borrowed' and the second half began. A tactical switch by North saw Steve Gray move to the right wing, and Jase out to the left. Last year's goalscorer, Craig Drought arrived, having been delayed by traffic, giving North another sub option. South, now playing into the wind, were finding it difficult to break out of their half, as Wilf couldn't get any distance on his goalkicks. Wave after wave of North attacks were repulsed, with Matt Bee playing exceptionally well in midfield.

Then came the two pivotal moments. Team South's star right-winger, Rich Atkinson, who had been causing some trouble for North in the first half, turned his knee and had to go to hospital, where it was diagnosed that he had strained his ligaments. We all wish him a speedy recovery.
This left South to play the remainder of the match a man down.
And the second pivotal moment was the introduction of Phil Hatchard. With fresh legs and playing with the wind, North became even more dangerous and it was a rearguard action for South from then on.

Phil scored the first goal, although there was some 'discussion' as to whether it went over the (imaginary) crossbar. The referee (Mrs 'J) finally decreed that it had. 1-1

With this setback, South were finding it difficult to get back into the game and North took the lead with a well-worked move, finished off by Sean Spaca. 2-1 to North.

South then tried to push out of defence and did manage to create a few chances, one from Stooz going just wide and Worm making a great onrushing block, again from Stooz, and also managing to force a corner, which came to naught.

But with tiredness setting in, it was just a question of how many more North would score. Phil Hatchard scored his second, with a great finish and Matt Bee put the icing on the cake with the fourth just before the final whistle (car horn), whenhe ran from halfway, outstripped the tired legs of Team South's backline and fired home just inside the post, winning The Shards back for Team North

It's all set up for a barnstomer in '09, as whoever wins, will get to keep The Shards! Just thirteen months to go!

FINAL SCORE:
Team North 4 - Hatchard (2) Gleeson Bee
Team South 1 - Hollands

TEAMS:
Team North: Worm, Spaca, Thomas, Rem, SiVar, Bee, Steve G, Jase Smith, Andrew The Bear
Subs (all used): Phil H, Jamie, Craig, Zena
I don't think I've missed anyone out, have I?

Team South: Wilf, Warren, Del, Kneller (Jon), Kneller (Martin), Tigger, Sarah Kebab, Stooz, Rich Atkinson
Sub (well, not exactly sub, just got there late): Scotty

ATTENDANCE
Fluctuated between a couple of dozen or so and about ten, depending on how cold it got!

MAN OF THE MATCH
Tigger - who for the duration of the game, seemd to forget that she has a second G in her name, and played like a tiger

This post has been edited by Joinee Del: 23 March 2008 - 12:59 PM

[PJ Hannah B-R]

That has to be THE most biased report of a match I have EVER read. Ever.

Make all the excuses you want, you lost. HA.

[GJ Dandy David]

Quote

you skinny little

Thanks for the compliment

[Joinee Meek]

NORTH!! Wahey!!!!!!!!!! I am still buzzin'.

[Thomas]

RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

[Mr Phil]

Match Photos Start Here: Clicky

Unfortunately many of the pivotal moments don't appear. As I was on the pitch at the time.

[DG Joinee NEMESIS]

Captain K, on 22 Mar 2008, 05:03 PM, said:

Hannah: sorry - I'm not there!

But: what, the ball really did burst? Spooky!

Yes it did
we all now blame you!

Joinee Del, on 23 Mar 2008, 12:57 PM, said:

MATCH REPORT

North sportingly also started with nine to even things out, but this of course meant they had subs to use!


TEAMS:
Team North: Worm, Spaca, Thomas, Rem, SiVar, Bee, Steve G, Jase Smith, Andrew The Bear
Subs (all used): Phil H, Jamie, Craig, Zena

Great Match report that !!!

Not TOOOooo biased either...apart from all this subs nonsense :-)
Field a full size team next time and you'll have an option....or get your manager to sort your plater attendance out!

that said - perhaps we should review the "rolling subs" point if South have issue with the 4-1 massacre!




(Well played our boys of the north - you earned it - especially given we had the brunt of the weather in the first half!)

Captain K, on 22 Mar 2008, 05:03 PM, said:

Hannah: sorry - I'm not there!

But: what, the ball really did burst? Spooky!

Yes it did
we all now blame you!

Joinee Del, on 23 Mar 2008, 12:57 PM, said:

MATCH REPORT

North sportingly also started with nine to even things out, but this of course meant they had subs to use!


TEAMS:
Team North: Worm, Spaca, Thomas, Rem, SiVar, Bee, Steve G, Jase Smith, Andrew The Bear
Subs (all used): Phil H, Jamie, Craig, Zena

Great Match report that !!!

Not TOOOooo biased either...apart from all this subs nonsense :-)
Field a full size team next time and you'll have an option....or get your manager to sort your player attendance out!

that said - perhaps we should review the "rolling subs" point if South have issue with the 4-1 massacre!




(Well played our boys of the north - you earned it - especially given we had the brunt of the weather in the first half!)

[PJ Stevie G]

Silver Joinee'The Daddy', on 23 Mar 2008, 02:19 PM, said:

(Well played our boys of the north - you earned it - especially given we had the brunt of the weather in the first half!)

I miss the hail. The hail was fun.

I also hear you were shouting at me while I was tying my laces (Not that I actually heard, that dang wind)
Pure passion from our manager though.

[Gold Bismuth Shortt]

It was such a laugh - especially with the rain, sleet, hail, snow, driving wind and occasional sun

The North and South both played a blinder game making the weather seem boring

Big up to the Northern cheerleaders, which involved wearing the big black and orange jackets, screaming rude chants and heckling in the most ladylike fashion!!!

xxx

[Joinee Mum White]

What about the ref? The ref remained ladylike and elegant throughout! Mrs J is a super star! Mum White x

[SJ Del (The Train Man)]

Silver Joinee'The Daddy', on 23 Mar 2008, 02:19 PM, said:

Great Match report that !!!

Not TOOOooo biased either...apart from all this subs nonsense :-)

But all proper match reports have team line-ups and the subs!

This post has been edited by Joinee Del: 23 March 2008 - 03:57 PM

[SJ Del (The Train Man)]

GJ Hannah B-R, on 23 Mar 2008, 01:02 PM, said:

That has to be THE most biased report of a match I have EVER read. Ever.

Make all the excuses you want, you lost. HA.

No, the *most* biased report would be the first draft that I wrote
Anyway, everything there is all troo!

[Joinee Smith]

We are best in the world! We are best in the world! We have beaten The South 4-1 in football!! It is completely predictable! We have beaten The South! The South, birthplace of nancys. Steve Phillips, Delboy, Shiny, Stooz, Both the Knellers, Warren, Lady Scotty--we have beaten them all. We have beaten them all. Dan Gates can you hear me?

Dan Gates, I have a message to you during your footballing campaign. I have a message to you: We have knocked the South out of the Join Me World Cup of football. Dan Gates, as they say in your language in boxing bars around Madison Square Garden in New York: Your boys took a hell of a beating! Your boys took a hell of a beating!



Jason